Saturday, February 20, 2010
You Always Have A Choice
I am catching a break between my daughter's volleyball games at a hometown tournament, so I ran home to write. That was my choice. I can't say I didn't feel a bit selfish leaving. I mean parents are suppose to sign up to help with the event, by taking admissions, helping in the concession stand. If I felt others judgement it was of my own doing. I had a choice and I made it.
I have a choice as I sit here writing; fold 4 loads of clean laundry or write. I made my choice. I do find pleasure and a sense of accomplishment in doing dishing, washing clothes and cleaning toilets. This morning I vacuumed the upstairs hallway and stairs. I couldn't stand it any longer. Admit it ladies, we get a rush when we hear those little particles of unwanted pieces getting sucked into the vacuum. INSTANT GRATIFICATION.
If you have time to follow your passions and keep a spotless house without killing yourself, I am envious. If keeping a spotless house is keeping you so busy, giving you an excuse to avoid your true self, well it is what it is. If you are killing yourself following your passions, you have some choices to make and some decluttering to do.
Most of the time I can accept loads of laundry and a sink full of dishes. I have a full life, but lately I am feeling as if I need to make some difficult choices. They are mine to make, taking into consideration my families well being. We love each other dearly. I know what I need to do and some days I feel I may not be strong enough. We've all been there from time to time.
When I have a choice between, love and fear. I choose love.
When I have a choice between me or you. I choose me, when I am low on fuel and have nothing to give to you. I choose being myself.
When I have a choice between writing or doing dishes. I choose dishes sometimes.
When I have a choice between my intuition (born beliefs) and borrowed beliefs. I choose to do my best to shred my fear, look past borrowed beliefs and go with my intuition.
Making choices means being OK with making some mistakes. Time to let go of some things and make more room for what is important, my passions, my family and helping others. I'm off, back to the high school to watch my daughter play volleyball. Life is a joy. This is what I love about volleyball.