Saturday, June 26, 2010

Dishwashing Dictators & Kind Cake Bakers

"I can give you guidance for doing a task, but unless you "discover" your own way of doing it you won't own it."- Tom Peters.

Oh my, what a control freak.  And over such a trivial thing, loading a dishwasher.  I sit quietly, trying to appreciate that another family member is actually loading the dishwasher. "Um, no, the glasses go on the right and the the bowls on the left."  And just to add a little more annoyance to their good deed I add, "For god sakes, you don't have to wash them before you put them in the dishwasher. Get it?  It's a "dish" "washer"."

I'm having flash backs of my mother lecturing us on how to properly wash a car.  "You always start at the top and work your way down. See this is how you do it (high pitched voice)."  We'd stand back and observe knowing that by the time the demonstration was over, half the car would be spotless and done HER way.  Such cruel children, but she brought it upon herself.  We should have just told her, "Mom, we yearn to make it our own."  Yeah, right. On a more serious note, I don't know where I would be without the work ethic instilled in me by my parents.   We always give my mom grief about her slave driving days.  Now that she has relaxed about 100 fold, it's so much fun imitating her.  Today, I go to the car wash.  It does an excellent good.

I'll never forget the day my mom came home from work, finding my sister Michelle, 10 years old at the time, in the kitchen with a baffled look on her face.  "Mom the egg whites won't dissolve."  Mom said, "What are you talking about?"  "Well, the shells are the only white part, so I figured....." Mom just smiled and we all giggled, She was thrilled that Michelle had taken the initiative to bake a cake all by herself.  Michelle certainly made it her own.  Mom wasn't angry.  I vividly remember mom pouring the batter into the strainer, filtering out the shells and showing Michelle how to separate eggs.  Today Michelle is an AWESOME cook. 

On the journey of Discovering Our B*a*g we need to seek out those Kind Cake Baking Travel Guides.  Generally, I find the best Travel Guides are story tellers who share their truth. They know when to listen and when to guide. Whether it be business tactics or life lessons, it's all the business of life and it all applies.  We  find our truth inside the truth of others. We don't feel so alone.

Try this on for size. "Paige, thanks so much for doing the dishes."  "Mom, I really don't like loading the dishwasher.  It takes too long and I really don't know how to set up the dishes."  To which I reply, "This is how I load the dishwasher.  You can try it my way and if it works, great.  Maybe you have a better way.  If you do find a better way be sure and let me know.  Here is an article I found on the subject, which I found to be a pretty reliable source.  I refer to it every now and again just to make sure I'm on track."  I am now imagining myself pulling away my June Cleaver mask like in the scene when the alien from Men in Black rips open the skin of his host human skin, farmer dude, revealing himself.  I think you get the point.  If you don't, well that's okay, it's just me.

Next time your Dishwasher Dictator rears its ugly head, just remember it is all based on your fear of losing control.  Could you trust yourself if something went wrong, like say a few dirty dishes.  Wow, really?  It sounds as ridiculous as keeping an article on the proper way of loading a dishwasher handy for frequent reference.

So, are you surrounding yourself with Kind Cake Baking Travel Guides?  Who are they? Make a list. Can't think of any? Set an intention of seeking them out.  My best travel guides:

  • share stories
  • listen
  • challenge me intellectually and spiritually
  • hold me accountable
  • are honest
  • are trust worthy (confirmed with their actions)
  • admit when they are wrong
  • make me laugh
  • make me cry
  • allow me to make mistakes, but is always ready with a life line 
I'll be introducing wonderful Travel Guides right here in the near future.  Won't you leave a comment and share some of your favorite Travel Guides.

1 comment:

LadyJtalks said...

It's hard to sore with Eagles when you are surrounded by Turkeys...right...this was a great article and easier said then done when you are in the company of people who really don't care and purposely do it wrong so that no one ask them to do it at all. To many people find it easier in life if they don't have to do it right. And yes, where would be be some days if it wasn't for all those lessons we had to perfect. I don't expect perfection, just care put into the job.