Thumbing Through My Journal - Very Interesting (to me anyway)

Today is about random thoughts that I captured in my journal these past few months. I will try to interpret them. And let's end this post with my bizarre amusement with the word verifications used by Blogger. You know that extra typing required to prove you are not some computer set out to SPAM us. Wonder if they have a paid position for somebody to make up these random letters, just to make me wonder about this stuff. I think I would be pretty good at that job. I should check into that. (not!)

OK......

Hmm, As I browse I have decided that I should date the pages in my journal.

OK....

Very first page - My daughter and her friend wrote me messages. "By the way Paige rocks... haha" and "Meagan is the coolest person in the world. Enjoy every minute of Life." These girls are wise beyond their years and apparently have some self confidence.

I've got a few pictures - Jars with labels such as, Volunteer, Compliments, Kid Pick the Game, Anti-Punishment (positive reinforcement), Joy, Blessings, I dare you to leave your worries at the door. This whole brain storm turned into me and the kids decorating 3 jars each. Joy, Fear, Fun. Sound familiar?

Pass the Buck? What the Cluck? - This has something to do with encouraging myself and others not to pass on poor quality and to take responsibility.

Oh yah! I do love my hubby! - My husband has given my entire family a gift. He is fun and spontaneous. Sometimes to the point that it wears me down. I am more introverted. Let's just say Tom can be a bit of a roller coaster ride. In the past I struggled more with this. .... I now can receive all of it in love. He provides great energy to a room. The next time I get overwhelmed I will remember it is a gift and give thanks.

Paige Protector comes to me in a dream as a dog. Need more signs please. Well let's just say we got a dog a few months later, after I vowed never to get another dog. We absolutely love our Chihuahua, Tula.

Waterproof Journal - LOL ! All I know is that I have the greatest ideas when I am in the shower and no place to write them down.

Now the girls were sweating and making up words - Swoobs, Swutt Crack, Swoes and Swarm Pits.

I should nap more fearlessly. When I play some people must think I am crazy. I know I am just a little wild. I live with some fear, but I must conquer it by learning and pushing myself.

Be patient. Listen. Follow.

Now for those word verifications:

IMINGISM - I am doing something ism.
SUPHERS - Surfing gophers.
PHILISE - Phy Lis Dillar
MEONY - If that person making up these words made more money they could spell money.
CLAIKER - This one has me stumped.

Well thanks for stopping by and hanging in there through this random post.

B*A*G Book Notes - Are You There Vodka? It's Me Chelsea

This book gives new meaning to LOL.

LOL in the morning. LOL in the afternoon. LOL in the evening. LOL at the deli. LOL during Gavin's hockey practice. LOL'ing is good for your brain you know. It brings oxygen to your brain. This book is my brain on oxygen.

I don't recall LOL'ing when I read, "Are You There God? It's me Margret. But honestly I don't remember anything about this book. I'm not even sure that I actually read it.

Chelsea Handler is a self proclaimed hypothetical liar, so I found myself wondering how much of this book was real and how much was purely real in her head. I think if I spent a day in her head I would be dizzy for some time.

*****Warning********

Chelsea (I feel like we should be on a first name basis after reading intimate details of her life) does not shy away from 4 letter words. I myself am not easily offended, but her vulgarity isn't what makes this book funny. She writes at the pace of her mind, rapidly bouncing between thoughts and situations that on the surface would seem unrelated, but in a bizarre funny way has you relating to your own vulgarity which is usually hidden away so others can't see.

I wouldn't put her in the "role model" category, but you have to appreciate her honesty and playfulness. If you like to play a little on the wild side you would probably enjoy this book and LOL. I know two other people that liked this book and one was even a man.

Fruity Tuity (Tooty) - Compliment?

Mom, "You are so Fruity Tuity any more." I am not really sure where my 13 year old daughter got the term fruity tuity and I am still contemplating its degree of compliment. She's not completely comfortable with how mom expresses her emotions freely. Its like if mom is so open that means I have to be open and I am not always comfortable with that.

Let's take FRUITY....... Tart but sweet...Nourishing.....Aromatic....Colorful

Here is the definition from Urban Dictionary and I will highlight the adjectives that suit me:


"Fruity" has a precise meaning, but is difficult to define. Loosely speaking, the word refers to something which is cheerfully and perkily saccharine, naïve, generic, corny, banal, innocuous, un-self-consciously dippy, sexually neutered (or, conversely, having perverse subtexts), or just plain dumb - and is amusing because of it. Dorkiness which doesn't even know that it's dorky, but celebrates its own dorkiness anyway: that which is flamboyantly and happily retarded. Closely synonymous with gay, in the not-necessarily-homosexual sense.

Now let's take Tuity or Tooty?

Here is the definition from Urban Dictionary. I am quite surprised with this definition.

something or someone that defines perfection. usually refers to a person.
Not only does he make me feel special in a way no one has, but he is just all around tooty.

Paige gave me a compliment and didn't even know it. How special is that. She just called me the perfect dork. LOL!!! She agrees with this summation and so do I.

The picture posted is Paige's Fruity Tooty picture entitled, "Peace Begins with Me". I love it. Look a curvy girl, a stick boyish figured girl and an athletic girl. They all agree, If it's to be it's up to me. Go be who you are even if its Fruity Tooty.

Popsicles Anyone?

The Lemonade Award has made its way to Minnesota's Modern B*a*g Ladies blog, Believe Act Go. Awarded by Marie from Permision to Unwind. I used the lemonade and made lemonade popsicles. Brrrrr! Check out Marie's spunky, fun view on life over at Permission to Unwind. Now I'm sharing my popsicles. Hurry up and put them in the freezer before they melt.

Here are the rules for receiving the Lemonade Award:

1. Put the logo on your blog or post.

2. Nominate at least 10 blogs which show great Attitude and/or Gratitude!

3. Link to your nominees within your post.

4. Let them know that they have received this award by commenting on their blog.

5. Share the love and link to this post and to the person from whom you received your award.

I am nominating the following 5 blogs:

Messages for Women

Have Fun * Do Good

Think Empoword

Thoughts of Joy

Sisters of Soul Blog

Happy Birthday to Me!!

I can remember not so long ago my husband forgot my birthday. No! Now that I think about it was 7 years ago. It probably hurt more that I will admit. Anyway, I called him, enthusiastically exclaiming, "Everyone at work decorated my office and filled it with balloons!" I thought he would reply, "Happy Birthday!" Nope and I felt stupid reminding him.

A) He was pissed at me. We did have a fight the night before and I figured he was being stubborn.

B) He didn't hear a word I had said during our phone conversation and actually did forget my birthday.

I was testing my husband. Would he disappoint me and would I allow him to do so? What would I do if he went the whole day without acknowledging my birthday? I could sulk. I could cry. Or I could just exclaim, "Happy Birthday To Me!"

I ended up reminding him. He was simply having one of those "brain fart" days and spaced it off and thought my co-workers were just playing a practical joke by filling my office with balloons.

What's a birthday, but not to remind you that you can emerge anew anytime no matter your age. The world was given a gift the day you were born, right? So 2 months ago I decided I would give myself a 40 something birthday present. I proclaimed this birthday commitment, which surely would prevent any hurt caused by forgetfulness.

Now I don't want to down play any great gifts I have been given in the past, but this gift I gave myself was indeed the best birthday gift I have ever gotten. As mentioned in my last post, MBL had their first workshop/mini retreat yesterday, Saturday 17th. A dream I had first envisioned May 2008. The reason it took me so long to actually have this event was because I was afraid nobody would come and I couldn't pull together 4 hours of compelling, interesting material and activities. I knew the boost I needed was to make my intentions public and to make a commitment to others that I was going to do it.

So on November 19th I announced this event in my weekly Traveling Sanctuary Newsletter. It would be held on January 17th, the day before my birthday. It would be my birthday present to myself. I wanted my mom and sister to be there, so I ASKED (strongly encouraged) them to make the 5 hour drive from Iowa to Minnesota. We would cross our fingers that the weather would cooperate.

My gift to myself was the courage to make a commitment and following through. Here are the bonus gifts I received as a result. I am returning to my Believe Act Go (Bag) Age indeed.

1. My sister and mom made the trip with good weather.
2. My sister made me a banana cream pie
3. My mom took down my Christmas tree
4. My 13 year old daughter enthusiastically assisted me at the workshop and was exposed to incredible ladies
5. I told stories and shared tools that helped ladies
6. Ladies openly shared themselves
7. I received encouragement that will fuel me to continue down the path of developing Modern B*a*g Ladies.
8. Admiration for other ladies
9. I could go on and on
   

The next time somebody reminds me about their birthday I will rejoice. I know they do not do this because they expect a gift. Rather I believe they have just given themselves a gift.

Give. Receive. Intentions. Deeds.

To everyone reading this, consider this your Happy Birthday wish. I am ashamed to say that I stink at keeping a birthday calendar and acknowledge other's (outside of my immediate family) birthdays. Note to self, "start a birthday calendar and start surprising others on their birthdays" They will most certainly be surprised getting a happy birthday wish from Kim. I really dislike myself for this lack of thoughtfulness.

Give It All You Got - Sleep Well

You know that feeling you get when you have given your all, mentally or physically? After you've experienced this feeling one's to wonder why they don't give it their all with everything they do.

Everything I do is not worthy of my precious time. I've come to notice my waste.

Today was worthy. Worthy of giving my all. Worthy of a dream I dreamt months ago. Many sleepless nights planning, writing, rehearsing in my head what I wanted to share with a captivate audience of ladies. Today I told my story and others shared theirs in turn (the best part of today).

Today was the very first Modern B*a*g Ladies Workshop/mini retreat. I gave it my all. Tonight I will sleep well. Ah it is the most satisfying slumber.

Feeding My "Pussy Cat"

I must have fed that pissed off, angry Pussy cat, that hibernates inside me. And I must have urinated in her Wheaties. What else would have caused her to pounce without warning. Worse of all my son was on the receiving end. Oh so sweet one second and BAM! claws and hissing ensue.

• I will take Wheaties off the menu,
• I will remind my children that mommy has flaws
• I will ask for a redo
• I will feed my Courage Cat
• My Courage Cat will fend off my Pussy Cat (cowardly little kitty)
  

B*A*G Book Notes - The Friday Night Knitting Club by Kate Jacobs

Our communities are vast. Our options are wide. Why oh why do we feel the need to hide?

I dream of one BIG OLE "coming out" party that turns into one BIG OLE intertwined ball made up of yarns of authentic human beings rather than human doings. This will require courage, forgiveness, giving, receiving and acceptance. We'd take this BIG OLE ball of yarn and knit some beautiful, interesting, weird, funny and questionable things. We will be in AWE, wanting more, exploring how and saying, "What if......"

As I read "The Friday Night Knitting Club" by Kate Jacobs it beckoned me back to the old days when women gathered, Quilting, Sewing, Knitting, Baking, Creating, but the setting of the novel is modern day NYC. A place that never sleeps and offers options, vast & wide. Single mother, widowed bride, business woman, snotty socialite, lost 9 to5er, not married-wants children, 13 to 75. They all yearned for a safe place, void of an agenda.

With all the options we have today we still yearn for the simple. We yearn to create. We yearn to connect, even when we are secretly hiding. Hesitant to share a glimpse of ourselves, hoping to be met with a smile, but afraid it will be met with judgement.

This book reminded me to be patient. It didn't knock my knitted socks off at the beginning, but it was worth the wait and my patience.

Jacob writes, " Every knitter has a sweater left unfinished; the bags of bits and pieces stashed away and never picked up again......there 's a secret hope that makes you hold on, to dream that you'll get it right someday.....The mistake is waiting until you feel renewed enough to give it another try. You simply have to pick up the needles and keep at it anyway"

My mom goes to quilting club. I wonder what it's like. She goes all the time. It must be good. What will I choose given all my options.

Magical Stories - The Gift of Writing

When you view your life as a story it becomes magical, even when it doesn't bring a happy ending. It's the magic of purpose, awareness, understanding, connectedness. To tell is to listen. To listen is to tell. "Life, I'm listening."

So you see, my purpose is to tell stories and it is so freaking FUN! I have given myself permission to view the world with a young. hopeful heart and mind. I have given myself permission to be truthful, honest and open. I have given myself permission to be myself, while realizing my inner critic can be as harsh as Simon Cowell. I actually came to myself in my dream, disguised as Simon Cowell, just so I could tell myself my writing stunk. This proved to me that we are our harshest critics.

So I say, "Simon Cowell, stick it up you know where" and I will continue to wake up saying, "Good morning world, what will I write about today?"

I journal, post on my blog and write a weekly newsletter, which would be quite the surprise to Mr. Wilkerson, the toughest English teacher in southeast Iowa's tri-county area.

So what's Kim's point today? Blah blah blah, get to the point. Even if you can't quite find the time to journal, don't want to start a blog or don't have a fan base that you fantasize soaks up every single word of your newsletter (a girl's gotta dream), you should view your life like you are required to share it through the written word. Why? Because when you are looking for material you have to be open, aware. You start to see the thread that connects the dots. You again view the world through your children's eyes. Besides story telling is fun even when you're reading silently to yourself.

Honestly, I write for me and I hope you get some enjoyment from it as well. And Mr. Wilkerson, I give myself an "A" for this post.

Rarely Asked Question #2 (RAQ's) - Is it ever ok to play with your food?

So, here's our RAQ for today. IS IT EVER OK TO PLAY WITH YOUR FOOD?

Food fights in the right setting is ok, but very disrespectful when it damages property. My daughter went to a Jello Rama Event. They threw Jello, played games with Jello and had a blast. Chef's play with food all the time. They create tastes, smells, presentation. My brothers used to make mash potato dams, holding back their gravy. Dam break, dam break, the green beans perished in the flood YUM!

What kid doesn't like a yummy spaghetti dinner? And what mom doesn't like a quick boil of the water, browning of hamburger and dumping of Ragu? Add salad for good measure. Voila!Italiano Superbo! Who can resist the extended sauce smile on our kids faces after a few noodle slurps?

In my never ending battle with coddling my 6 year old, last night, I couldn't resist regrouping his sauce covered noodles into a nice neat pile after he had devoured the middle leaving a big circle of noodles. The noodles were barely hanging on, ready to jump off the edge.

Now, there's nothing I like better than wiping up sauce and noodles from off the table, so I rounded up his noodles back to their rightful place (middle of the plate), much to his disappointment. "Mom you ruined my race track!" What could I do but smile?

Embracing his playful mind, his sister decided to create her own master piece. PHOTO OP! "Wait Paige, you forgot the hole in your P." With the twist of the wrist and a yummy bite it was complete.

Answer: Yes, play with your food in the right setting and without damaging property. Its a form of fun and creativity.

Do you play with your food? How? When? Where?

The Housework is Never Done

**Newsflash ** Newsflash**

*****Attention all family members inhabiting the Lampe domain we call a home*****

In an attempt to eliminate all housework we will adopt the following rules of engagement.....

1. Air will be our only source of nourishment as not to dirty a dish or create any waste required to be hauled out as trash.
2. We can no longer wear clothing that could be soiled, so therefore we must remain in our own domain as not to be arrested for indecent exposure.
3. We will sleep standing up so not to soil bedding.
4. A huge bubble will be constructed around our home sealing off all dirt and dust.
5. We can not exit this bubble hence being contaminated with outside dirt, which could be carried into our bubble.
6. Personal hygiene, now that my be a tricky one. I guess no showers, shaving or brushing our teeth. Can't be dirtying any vessels with soap scum, toothpaste or whiskers. Hmm, consuming air probably eliminates, elimination.

Hey as much I dislike housework and dislike more that it is the never ending story, let's just face it, "The dirt, trash, soap scum and sweat is worth the living of our lives". The day the housework ends is the day our life has ended.

As I climb the stairs, littered with stuff, I will take one thing at a time and put it back in its place. As I wash each dish I will feel blessed that we have been nourished with the food place upon it. As I wash each piece of clothing I will be reminded of the the worthy work we did that day. As I suck up dirt with my very lovely Kirby I am happy to be getting much needed exercise.

Now go live your life, get dirty, do the housework and enjoy it damn it! Oh ya, ask for help!